Whereas the first key competency we analyzed, gratitude, may have been more subtle, our second key competency, confidence, is probably a little more obvious to you. I really like how Google defines the word and want to share that here:
"Confidence is the feeling or belief on can rely on someone or something; firm trust."
I like it because it might not be what you think when you think about confidence, but it's so true. Let's not put your presuppositions about the word aside, though. When you think about a confident person, you probably think about somebody who knows their stuff and isn't afraid to share it. Speaking of that word, "afraid," confident people generally tend to be fearless.
One of my favorite illustrations of confidence is actually found in the Bible with none other than Jesus Himself. Let me paint a really quick picture for you. At this point in His ministry, Jesus has been preaching to small communities throughout the countryside. As the Christian faith holds, Jesus was well aware of his eventual fate (his death on a cross), so the author of Luke notes this particular thing:
Anyway, setting religious chats aside, I think you all understand the importance of confidence. I can't think of a single major leader that doesn't exude confidence, so instead of talking more about why it's important, let's jump into some tips on growing more confident!
1. Lose weight. Bam, we're not beating around the bush on this blog! For you who know me well, you know I speak from experience here. There is a reason I set this as number 1: it was the number 1 reason that made me more confident. I challenge you to find a single person who has lost weight that decreased in confidence. I can pretty well guarantee that you won't find one. Amongst all the other benefits that come with losing weight, confidence is a big one.
2. Get in front of people as often as you can. Renowned author Malcolm Gladwell has been on record of saying that a person becomes an expert in a field after having practiced 10,000 hours in it. Practicing confidence is the same way, and you really need confidence to stand in front of people. For me, I volunteered at one point in the new member ministry at church. It was a two-fold benefit: I worked on my people skills (and confidence), and it helped other people in the process. I am not as familiar with it, but you also might consider joining Toastmasters or something like that. Or volunteering to lead / facilitate meetings at work. Anything to get in front of more faces.
3. Work your way up from small wins to big wins. Think about it this way: when you tackle something big and fail, how do you feel? Probably discouraged, and your confidence is wrecked. If you approach it from small to big, the small wins help to progressively build your confidence. For me, I tackled my ITIL Foundations certificate before getting my PMP. If I had done it the other way around, I'm not sure I would have had the confidence to get my PMP at all. Think about how this can apply to your own life. It might be paying off smaller loans and working your way up to bigger loans.
4. Dress well. If you recall from my review of Sophia Amoruso's #GIRLBOSS, one thing I applauded is that she did not shy away from encouraging women to dress up. This is because some women movements might say that women shouldn't have to dress up for men. This statement is agreeable, but it's missing a key idea: attire is synonymous with attitude and persona. Goths dress like goths because they want to express who they are in that way. Similarly, people dress well because it instills in themselves a sense of confidence. It's the same reason that, while losing weight, my wardrobe transformed from a dresser full of wolf t-shirts to a closet full of Express clothes.
5. Become more knowledgeable in your field. Confidence and value go hand-in-hand. When a person (or group of people) value you more, you become more confident. And how do you get people to value you more? Simple: make yourself invaluable by becoming more a subject matter expert (SME). Prior to becoming a scrum master in my current role, I went about getting my formal Certified Scrum Master and Certified Scrum Product Owner certifications. As my team moved to an agile framework, I was able to add a lot of value having previously gained this knowledge and thus my confidence increased. Value may also come in the form of serving in a nonprofit.
"Confidence is the feeling or belief on can rely on someone or something; firm trust."
I like it because it might not be what you think when you think about confidence, but it's so true. Let's not put your presuppositions about the word aside, though. When you think about a confident person, you probably think about somebody who knows their stuff and isn't afraid to share it. Speaking of that word, "afraid," confident people generally tend to be fearless.
One of my favorite illustrations of confidence is actually found in the Bible with none other than Jesus Himself. Let me paint a really quick picture for you. At this point in His ministry, Jesus has been preaching to small communities throughout the countryside. As the Christian faith holds, Jesus was well aware of his eventual fate (his death on a cross), so the author of Luke notes this particular thing:
When the days drew near for him to be taken up, he set his face to go to Jerusalem. ~ Luke 9:51Dang, talk about a powerful image!. This guy knows he's going to die a gruesome death, yet he sets a powerful, confident image by setting his face toward the place that will bring his demise.
Anyway, setting religious chats aside, I think you all understand the importance of confidence. I can't think of a single major leader that doesn't exude confidence, so instead of talking more about why it's important, let's jump into some tips on growing more confident!
1. Lose weight. Bam, we're not beating around the bush on this blog! For you who know me well, you know I speak from experience here. There is a reason I set this as number 1: it was the number 1 reason that made me more confident. I challenge you to find a single person who has lost weight that decreased in confidence. I can pretty well guarantee that you won't find one. Amongst all the other benefits that come with losing weight, confidence is a big one.
2. Get in front of people as often as you can. Renowned author Malcolm Gladwell has been on record of saying that a person becomes an expert in a field after having practiced 10,000 hours in it. Practicing confidence is the same way, and you really need confidence to stand in front of people. For me, I volunteered at one point in the new member ministry at church. It was a two-fold benefit: I worked on my people skills (and confidence), and it helped other people in the process. I am not as familiar with it, but you also might consider joining Toastmasters or something like that. Or volunteering to lead / facilitate meetings at work. Anything to get in front of more faces.
3. Work your way up from small wins to big wins. Think about it this way: when you tackle something big and fail, how do you feel? Probably discouraged, and your confidence is wrecked. If you approach it from small to big, the small wins help to progressively build your confidence. For me, I tackled my ITIL Foundations certificate before getting my PMP. If I had done it the other way around, I'm not sure I would have had the confidence to get my PMP at all. Think about how this can apply to your own life. It might be paying off smaller loans and working your way up to bigger loans.
4. Dress well. If you recall from my review of Sophia Amoruso's #GIRLBOSS, one thing I applauded is that she did not shy away from encouraging women to dress up. This is because some women movements might say that women shouldn't have to dress up for men. This statement is agreeable, but it's missing a key idea: attire is synonymous with attitude and persona. Goths dress like goths because they want to express who they are in that way. Similarly, people dress well because it instills in themselves a sense of confidence. It's the same reason that, while losing weight, my wardrobe transformed from a dresser full of wolf t-shirts to a closet full of Express clothes.
5. Become more knowledgeable in your field. Confidence and value go hand-in-hand. When a person (or group of people) value you more, you become more confident. And how do you get people to value you more? Simple: make yourself invaluable by becoming more a subject matter expert (SME). Prior to becoming a scrum master in my current role, I went about getting my formal Certified Scrum Master and Certified Scrum Product Owner certifications. As my team moved to an agile framework, I was able to add a lot of value having previously gained this knowledge and thus my confidence increased. Value may also come in the form of serving in a nonprofit.
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