The Debt of Fear

When you think about fear, you mind might jump to the things most people are willing to admit. Spiders, snakes, heights. These are things people are willing to admit easily because they are consistent amongst most people and don’t reveal the real nature of our core being.

But what about dying alone?

Not being respected by your coworkers?

Difficulty losing weight?

Being hated by a family member?

Not knowing if God exists?

It’s no surprise to anybody why these fears are not tossed out during icebreaker conversations at a work outing. They’re embarrassing and bring shame to ourselves. Many of us don’t even like to think about them in the quiet of our own minds. Some try to drown out the fears in other activities like drugs, alcohol, or even non-vice-like things like playing too many video games or trying to coach somebody else through their “lesser” fears.

I recently came to a realization that may seem obvious after you read it, but it has rewired many of my thoughts recently: we can’t afford NOT to face our fears.

The thing about fear is that the fear of failing to overcome those fears often trumps our willingness to act toward overcoming those fears. In other words, a fear of fear itself paralyzes us from making ourselves better.

But ask yourselves this question: what do you truly stand to lose? Is the way in which your fear is plaguing you not worth doing everything you can to overcome that?

I’ll illustrate with one of my own fears. I shared briefly in this blog’s introductory post that this is my third attempt at a blog like this because I am afraid people are either going to think I’m dumb or naïve or simply not care about what I have to say. From this, I had two choices I could make.

1. Restart the blog and check my own ego at the door
2. Never restart the blog and always wonder what could have been

For the longest time, I went with option 2. But my fear ate at me. What am I leaving on the table? Possibly more importantly, what would I be doing with the time I have available now that my Master’s degree is done? I’d probably just wallow in self-pity, always wondering what could have been.

From another perspective, what’s the worst that could happen? Really, it’s next to nothing. I’m out the $12 I spent on the domain name and may only reach a cap of 3 readers. If anything, I’m still in the positive because at least I tried, and I won’t have to spend time wondering what could have been.

What’s stopping you from facing your fears? Will not facing your fears be more detrimental to you in the long run if you never even tried at all to overcome them? You might find, like me, that trying, at the very least, is better than not trying at all.